As a photographer, especially a female photographer there comes a time when inquiries and clients can and will creep us out. That will ignite the our flight or fight response and send chills down our spine. It may not happen often but when it does it just enough to make us question why we do this, how we handle these situations and it makes us evaluate the sessions we feel comfortable doing.

Last month I received a text message from a male who wanted a male boudoir session. Now I have photographed men, I have photographed men in different states of dress, but something about these message made me pause. It felt off.

So I declined the session. That’s where it became clear I made the right call. The guy became pushy, volunteering to rent a studio and going as far to say he was good looking and would sign a release. I reiterated my refusal, recommended he seek a photographer in a bigger city who would be more comfortable and blocked the number.

It is a scary day when women even have to evaluate who we take a clients and when we can tell from a text message that there is something off with a man. When we become more and more adverse to taking them as clients because of our own safety rather than because the art doesn’t align with what we want to do.

Reading the messages seems innocent enough, seems. These messages were flying in, in rapid succession at 9 0’clock at night, thanks to a quick google search of the number I was able to disconcert the mans age and while usually not a factor was a hesitation as well the location this number was from.

It felt every bit of the start of a missing persons tale photographer edition.

Could I have judged this completely unknown person harshly and inaccurately?? Absolutely. But as of this moment I feel safe and secure in the decision in knowing I am not putting myself at risk.

And that is the choice we will make as women and business owners again and again. Trust your instincts the worse that can happen is you miss out on is a little bit of income. Which is far better than the alternatives when a potential client creeps you out.